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Neil deGrasse Tyson is a sanctimonious douche who says the word "science" a lot. He's why people get orgasmic from the smell of their own farts as they virtue-signal about "believing in science." He and a children's entertainer for some reason. Neil fell off a little when he got Me Too'd, but Tyson will still chime in and let you know how much he still f*cking loves science by fact-checking fiction. His latest target? Top Gun: Maverick.
According to Mr. Science, when Tom Cruise ejects from a hypersonic plane at Mach 10.5 before it crashes, he wouldn't survive with no injuries as he did in the fictional movie. At that airspeed his body would splatter like a, quote, "chainmail glove swatting a worm." Which is a pretty sick description. But, dude. Shut the f*ck up.
I can't decide if Tyson is really this big of a douche, or if this is his attempt at humor and he thinks being a douche is charming. All I know is that our dude never recovered after being destroyed by a steak sandwich.
Don't stop there, Neil. On behalf of the Internet, we demand an entire series breaking down the Mission Impossible franchise one by one and declaring that, by using science, none of the missions are impossible.
Then, if he has the strength, tackle the Fast and Furious franchise with special guest Vin Diesel. Having Neil explain gravity to Vin that cars can't really fly would be entertaining. Also, that doesn't have family. Only acquaintances who need the franchise to pay their bills.
News broke today that Tom Cruise is going to be the first actor to film a movie in space. Somewhere in his basement, ferociously banging away on Twitter in his basement with a single lightbulb hanging over his head and swaying back and forth, Neil deGrasse Tyson can't even.
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October 10, 2022 at 08:42AM - Brodigan
Neil deGrasse Tyson wants you to know that 'Top Gun: Maverick' isn't sciencey enough for him
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